Saturday, October 23, 2010

Fucking pumpkins, how do they work?

Went to the pumpkin carving for Alpha Psi Omega, my theatre frat. Ended up meeting my Big. She's a slightly chubby girl who carved her pumpkin into the shape of the roses crossed with the wand from the Tale of Beedle the Bard.

I made an awesomeface. Unoriginal, I know, but I'm terrible at art. Anyway, as presents I got twix, root beer, a foam sword and a supersoaker.

I met at least ten-twenty people, and we discussed many things. One guy was in a One Piece costume. Just because.

Had a conversation that included fan fiction Dungeons and Dragons vs. Star Wars the rpg, one guy knew who Eluveitie was, and a million other awesome things.

Going to Rocky Horror tonight. I'm a Rocky Virgin. Hope my outift isn't terrible.

Well, I have to go and do some shopping for fishnets before Goodwill closes.

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Bullshit: the awesome kind.

I'm disappointed that my page impressions were previously 1337, and now they're 1437. Way to suck, page impressions, way to suck.

So I have a way of not being productive in the ways that the average person/society thinks that you should be, but productive in ways I enjoy being.

I have an 8 am class, which for a lot of us late-nite interweb surfers means you'll fall asleep. Long story short come exam time (tomorrow) I was missing a lot of notes. I woke up promptly at 11:45 (I don't need your judgement) and went to go copy notes from some uber-short, annoying ginger girl from my world civ class. (When I first met her she was talking about LARPing and roleplaying, and I'm like, "Awesome!" And then she didn't stop talking. For twenty minutes. It was terrible.) She proceeded to spend a good portion of me being her room copying notes singing to Avenged Sevenfold (she has one of those good voices that tries too hard so they sound like they're trying to be an opera singer when they're not) and talking about some initiation for a sorority she got into.

Anyways, copy some of the notes, go and eat, go copy the other parts of the notes I was missing (and I'm still missing one section) from someone else, and they'd get my parts. But my friend can't read my handwriting (for a girl, I have terrrible handwriting) and so I go to my room, type up his parts, send them to him, then type the rest of his cause I was too lazy to write and then brought him the notes.

Now I was going to crochet a Hufflepuff scarf for my "Big" (see the posts with Severus Snape for more info on this) and had a lot of work to do. So I started crocheting. Then ran into my bf while walking back from dropping off notes,, we end up hanging out and got...distracted. Then I had a study session from 8-11 that the school offers.

I go there, bring my crochet stuff just in case, and lo and behold it's boring and shit and I can't focus. So I pull out my yarn and begin crocheting (I just taught myself last week how to) and have a decent chunk going on my halfway-finished piece. So I find out it's much easier to listen if I'm doing something rote and mechanic.

I need to switch colors (the scarf is striped gold and black, of course) but I didn't bring my scissors. So I ask somebody if I can copy the notes I'm missing, do that, and get the hell out of there.

Talk to my sister for 45 minutes about how my older brother's inability to connect with me may or may not be splintering the whole sibling dynamic (big family, 4 siblings and me) and other things.

Go get a pizza. Manage to ride a bike while holding a pizza. Feel accomplished. Type up notes. Send them to Kyle. Take picture of the map of the different civilizations we're studying, send that to him as well.

Go into bathroom. Sit on toilet from peeing, type this blog still sitting on the toilet even though I've long since been finished.

So, tl;dr
Lazy at some stuff, weird productive at others
-still haven't finished studying when I've known about the test for a week -con
-do some very extraneous work to get all of the necessary notes -pro
-manage to both crochet a scarf and listen to work at the same time -fuck yeah pro
-some other bullshit- pro and con respectively.

so I can get a lot of stuff done very well, just not what people might traditionally think of as necessary. Well I'm happy after days like this.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Awkward roommate moments

-When she walks in and I'm still in the same spot she left me four hours ago--on my computer without pants where I was when I woke up.
-When I'm pooping in the bathroom and I hear it make a realllyyy loud plunk and I'm afraid she can hear it.
-When her side of the room is extremely tidy and mine looked like a laundromat threw up under my bed.
-When she yells at her boyfriend on the phone in front of me.
-When she yells at her boyfriend in front of my company.
-When she has her annoying friends over twenty times a day and they ask me inane questions. "What's thrift shopping?" "OMG, what's that on your face?!" (It's a microdermal, for those of you that ask.)
-That one day they spent about ten minutes asking me if I had heard of a million different shitty pop bands because I hadn't heard of one artist and didn't listen to Kesha or Lil Wayne, who will forever be Weezy to me, goddamnit. And no, they didn't know what the hell Primordial was, or hardstyle.
-When I've been using her toilet paper for about three months without buying any.
-Start video on laptop, forget to check sound--either screaming death metal, Onision or pornography sounds blast out. Hope I didn't wake her.
-That one night out of the entire time I've been here I ask her if me and my boyfriend can have the room alone, and she asks us how much time we'll need.
-When all of the girls on my floor have a get together in the lounge directly across from my room during this time and I'm secretly afraid they can all hear us.
-When she has a tv she doesn't watch blaring, her music on loud (soooo much Kesha) and I have to ask her to be quiet.
-Massive amounts of passive aggression.


I'm aware a lot of this is because of me (like keeping a messy room) but she's always extremely loud and on the phone at all hours with her laptop music, phone and tv on, she has people over at all hours of the day when I rarely entertain in side my dorm, so I consider us even. Maybe not the best living arrangement, but a passable one.

Do you have any awkward roommate moments/stories?

Monday, October 18, 2010

The nature of intelligence

From helping people in general with writing assignments, or even just reading their work, I've realized I can tell a lot about them from their writing. Their construction process, meaning the way in which they categorize their ideas and the shape their various paragraphs take, shows their thinking patterns. The writing itself obviously shows if you're smart, or just trying to be. Overcompensating with big words is kind of a give away. It also shows how capable you are at critical thinking. A disproportionately large number of people seem to lack this trait almost altogether, which is one of the most important as far as intelligence goes. I honestly don't know how so many people get through the day without honestly understanding logic and reason.

I used to think the purely logical person was soulless and had little emotion. Now I realize logic can create order in a world of chaos. You can still use reasoning and logic to guide your decisions and allow yourself to feel emotion at the same time. You just understand the various causes of the emotion and address that problem, as opposed to doing your first instinct. For instance suppose a woman catches her boyfriend flirting with another girl and is inflamed by jealousy. She demands he talks to no other woman. The problem isn't the flirting, it's the woman being out of the kitchen. No, I'm kidding. The problem is the spark that caused thejealousy. Is it insecurity that causes it? Was it feelings of betrayal? (In some relationships it's alright to flirt, in others it's not.) Were she to see this and react accordingly, either by dealing with the insecurity, or discussing how he crossed boundaries, it would be alright. Then the whole "I'm a crazy bitch" thing need never have come into play.

You could also argue that art and literature are more often based solely on emotion and not on reason. In many cases this is true. But there are also some instances where reason plays in. As an avid science fiction fan, I can say that most of those books would lose their effectivity if they lacked some kind of logic behind the science and instead were "Oh hey look a bunch of crazy shit happens." Even the most insane of mangas at least has rules that govern them in some form or another.

But I'm talking about critical thinking, not just logic. Of course the two play into each other. I think mainly the reason that "stupid" people are so stupid is not because of a genetic defect, but because they don't take the time to think things through, and see the proper chain of events and the situation as a whole would make more sense were they to look at it. Instead they see a situation, have an emotional reaction, and the first thought that comes to mind is what they stick with vehemently despite any outside influence. Were they to just have really looked at the situation in the first place, this would never have happened. Of course we are a society fueled in large part by ignorance and circuitous logic. i guess you can't say there are no people that use intelligent thought in their everyday life. They just use it incorrectly.

Here's an example (albeit a poor, half-baked one). Johnny is fapping. He's really going at it. He's a few strokes away from monster dickburn and Enlightenment all in one. Billy, Johnny's roommate, walks in on him. He's in shock. They both stare for a moment. Billy looks at Johnny, at his dick in his hand, at the screen, and walks out. If he used a purely emotional reaction in his brain, it would have gone like this. "Johnny is masturbating. Fuckin' gross!"

But Billy is a critical thinker, and thinks about what it means that Johnny is masturbating. Now a logical conclusion one might reach is "Well, he's horny, so sought to satisfy himself sexually." You might even take it further and use outside influences to draw the conclusion, "Well I haven't seen a girl for a while, so maybe this is a regular occurrence." Someone even more concerned might see Johnny being hard-up for a girl as a problem, and might suggest a solution. "Well, there's a cute girl in the dorm downstairs that's into the same movies. Maybe I could introduce them." Or if you're a dick. "There's a hooker a few streets down. I should sneak her into his bed. Damn that would be lulzy."

This is the logical, but false conclusion that Billy actually reaches. "He's masturbating. Masturbating is a sin. Johnny is going to hell." Billy knows this means that they have ideological differences. Some solutions? "We could discuss hanging a tie on the door so I no longer have to see his indiscretions." The shit Billy actually thinks? "I'm going to get my Bible group and have them throw holy water at Billy the next time he has his pants down."

Is this a rant against religion? Not really (that's for another day.) Against masturbation? Fuck no. Masturbation is awesome.

It's more meant to show how critical thinking is important as far as intelligence is concerned, but when used incorrectly it can be even fucking worse than ignorance in the first place. Consider Billy and Johnny a metaphor for how things work currently in most societies (not just America).

Teehee. I love misogyny jokes. They're always so much more funny coming from a woman.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

The obsession with Slenderman

My friends are always talking about creepypasta. When we take walks at night (as the nocturnal lifestyle of the videogamer often leads to), they'll invariably comment on the scenery and the landscape as if it were an opportunity for us to be attacked by a Cthulian monster. At times I was so unnerved by it (and as recently as last night) I would be extremely belligerent in demanding that they stopped.

Last night we walked through a graveyard. I kept my head. They said they saw something, heard something, and wanted to go after it. I requested that they leave it alone. Why bug it? I guess that's my theory on Slenderman, or men, depending on your belief. If I get attacked by an (I assume) an unworldly monster, or another creature, to be more precise, well then there's not much I can do about that. But am I going to seek it out? Hell no.

So I guess I do believe in it on some level, even though I do have my sobering moments of complete atheism. I don't know if I'll ever be one of those curious enough to seek out those types of mysteries. Is it out of fear? Maybe. Out of respect for the privacy and lives (in whatever form they may exist) for those other beings? Maybe. I don't know, I just don't think of the need for Slenderman or ghost hunting. Now obviously if one goes out and attacks you or others for no good reason, that's hardly fair. But going into their territory on some other day unrelated to anything, that's hardly fair to them.

Am I terribly weird, for having this idea of "respecting the privacy" of these creatures? For humanitarian reasons for things that aren't considered human? Do to my own code of ethics, I don't think so. But others might differ. Please, discuss it.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Bernard Golberg--a rap

I was talking with my friend about a speech topic on msn, and I was SOOO excited cause I remembered one of my sources was Bernard Golberg, but I couldn't remember his name. So we made a rap about him. Black is me, blue is my friend. Please pardon the terrible formatting--I copy-and-pasted straight from the convo

fucking golberg, likely a jew
doesn't fuckin' matter, he's richer than you

AHHH SHIT YOU WISH YOU HAD HIS KITTENS CAUSE HE'S A JEW MORE MONEY THEN GATES, BUT NEVER STOPPING THE FLOOD, THESE HOT BEATS FLYING FROM HIS MOUTH WRITTEN IN A BOOK, HE'S NOT YOUR COMMON MOOK

GOLBERG GOT A DICK ABOUT 49 INCHES,
REPORTIN ON THE WAR, ALL UP IN THOSE FUCKIN TRENCHES;
THAT'S A METAPHOR FOR ALL THE PUSSY HE BE GETTIN;
HE WORKS ON FOX NEWS, BUT HIS OPINION YOU BE RESPECKIN

WROTE A BOOK ON MEDIA BIAS;
GONNA STOP ALL THOSE LIBERAL LIAHS;
FUCKING ON THE O'REILLY FACTOR;
mORGAN FREEMAN? GOLBERG IS BLACKER.

MIGHT AS WELL CALL HIM A SAINT BERNARD,
CAUSE YOU BRINGS YOU SHIT YOU NEED OVER MANY A YARD;
BUT HE DEALS NOT IN FOOD, BUT IN INFORMATION,
FUCKING SHIT UP IN THIS MEDIA-FUCKED NATION

Thursday, October 7, 2010

all these fuckin' maids

So I live in one of the best dorms on campus. (Someone did the math and it would actually be cheaper to get an apartment, but that's besides the point.) So we have maintenance crew that do general upkeep, and once a month they'll come in your room and clean your bathroom for you (it's a private bath).

Well today is that day. I get on the elevator on the first floor, and there's about six black maids, cleaning women, whatever the pc term is on there. Now it's fine, and all of the floors are selected (there's four floors) but I don't mind.

Well we start going, and one maid starts with this. "Man, I'm fucking tired. I don't need this bullshit today." And she says it loudly and very audibly. And all the other maids look at her, and some start saying, "C'mon now, don't speak like that." And she keeps going. "Man I'm fucking tired. What you mean be quiet? I'm gonna say whatever the fuck I want."

A couple were urging her, "Kesha do you need to get off the elevator? Kesha just step off for a minute and speak with us." They even pressed the open button but she just stayed on there. "What the fuck I'm just gonna go upstairs and do my fucking working I don't need this goddamn bullshit."

And she's saying this random string of obscenities for a good minute (it's an average speed elevator) while about five other people are asking our dearest Kesha to please be quiet. I got off on the third floor (my stop) and they were still yelling at her and she was still cursing when I stepped off. I yelled back "You ladies have a nice day!", but for obvious reasons they couldn't hear me. Now it was a small elevator and it was packed, and the way we were standing I was facing all of these arguing black women. I was smiling and chuckling the whole time this was going on, of course refraining from laughing obnoxiously.

Honestly I didn't mind her behavior. Now if she had directed her comments at anyone (especially me) that would've been different, but everybody has annoying days and have freedom of speech to express that. Maids are no different, they can be pissed too. Well I want to thank you, Kesha, for making my day that much more enjoyable, and hope you that bullshit got taken care of after you did your fucking work.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

My awesome week.

Here's a short recap.
  • My friends Baudin and Graham played didgeridoos outside for about an hour, with Michael on the bongos. My friend Kyle would occasionally punctuate it with a blast from his vuvuzela. They had a big box labeled "Put $$$ in here!" and Baudin would yell out MONEY at random moments while still keeping rhythm on his didg. They made almost THREE dollars. Holy shit.
  • Watched Black Dynamite.
  • Me and my loveliest Jody made it to eight months! Fuck yeah!
  • We had HOURS of cuddling that day!!
  • We piled eight people into Tucker, Baudin's SUV. Start driving, see tons of balloons on the road. Shove about twenty balloons into the car with us.
  • Go to Waffle House. The chef called me a boy on accident (I'm not exactly androgynous, pretty obviously a girl) and I got a free waffle. Hells yeah.
  • My new friend Ben from history gave me a bag of generic Fruity Pebbles. Shit yeah.
I went to go see a comedy improv troupe called the Stagemonkeys. Here's some of the highlights:
  • Walked out to go to restroom, walk back in and everybody is singing I'll Make A Man Out of You from Mulan. EVERYBODY. And other Disney tunes apparently while I was gone. MLIA worthy.
  • They ask a suggestion for a scene. Somebody says "the maid puts a baby in the microwave." They act it out.
  • Three scenes have this ongoing joke.
  • "Give us a movie that's coming out" "Rocky Balboa in Grease!" my contribution. They acted it out. Fucking win.
  • They had a scene that took place on the Titanic. They had a mat and a bucket of water. At least one team member had to have their head in the bucket at all times. Hold your head under as long as you can, then switch off.
  • The finale: mousetraps. DOZENS of them. Then they blindfolded the participants. What were the audience suggestions? Breakdancing battle. As Mario and Luigi.