Thursday, July 22, 2010

Wow. Two posts in one day. Aren't I cool. I really, really want a job. No, let me correct that--I don't by any means want a job, but I most certainly want the money that comes along with a job. I'm tired of not having things and even though my sister says it's best to not work if you don't have to I really would like to very much. I'd only have to work ten hours or so a week. I'd have all of my expenses except for a few hundred covered, so I could increase my budget by a bit, put a shitload into savings for the summer/next year, and have extra money to spend on whatever the hell I want.

Another thing that concerns me is my choice of major. I was originally going to double major in both English and Physics (the English degree having a minor in Theatre) , mainly because I'm interested in both fields and wasn't sure what I wanted to do. I do love Physics, and the fact is I could make amazing money there. The downside being that getting a degree in both fields would require me to take at least three classes every summer semester, which isn't covered by FAFSA, in order to finish within four years (a requirement for me).

I could also drop Physics and just do English with a minor in Theatre. I'm very much in love with both English and Theatre, and considered double majoring in both fields--until I realized that this would take even longer than Physics and English would, not even including a minor! It's all very silly, really.

I'm reluctant to drop Physics. If I do, then I won't have the necessary pre-reqs, and I'll have to go back and take a shitload of courses anyway. The thing is, I don't think I'll know enough about either field to know whether or not I want to take it until I actually take some classes from both of them.

I wouldn't even be able to take Physics classes until second or third year because of all the pre-reqs, and how am I supposed to know now whether or not I like it when i'm relatively ignorant on the subject? (Keep in mind not completely ignorant, but I'm far from an authority.)

I am by no means dropping English. I know no matter what I do it will involve writing, and the same is true for Theatre. Like I said I'm reluctant to drop Physics, but I wonder if this is true for the wrong reasons. Do I love it enough to do it, or do I love the idea of how well I could do in that field?

Honestly, I'm good in many fields. I could succeed in just about anything I set my mind to, virtually the only exceptions being sports or singing.

I think I need to go with my heart on this one. It's funny because I just keep thinking about how much I'll be missing out on if I drop Physics. Honestly I think I might just go and talk to the Physics and English and Theatre departments and see if we can't make this work. There are online courses for a reason, after all.

Man, I really wish there was a "scene" of some type here. And by here, I mean semi-rural, small town coastal Mississippi. I do love my friends and whatnot, but I particularly need to go out, to do things. Go to a rave, which I've never been to. Learn how to hardstyle dance. Be able to enjoy various "scenes". Not to belong to a stereotype, not because I have some sort of lack of belonging that I'm seeking to fulfill, but purely to experience and enjoy. I want to listen to screeching black metal and bass heavy blast beats of melodeath.

I want to go to an anime convention even though I don't know anything about it, just to learn. I want to learn things. Learn about computers and classical theaters and Arabic and the Quran and why in the hell there aren't any wrestling schools near central MS.

I'm watching Aqua Teen Hunger Force. My boyfriend is lonely, and I'm in desperate need of cuddles. Good morning and good night, respectively.


  1. MY EYES!!! Definitely should look at that whole text to background color contrast thing.

  2. Get into the hardcore scene, its the best scene around :]